Crypto Trading Platform Says Owning Crypto Will Totally Get You Laid

A crypto trading app claims, astoundingly, that it’s found that being into cryptocurrency will get you a date.  

In an article this week covering a survey by trading platform eToro, that “33% of Americans said they would be more likely to go on a date with someone who mentioned crypto assets in their online dating profile.” eToro is a trading app like Robinhood or Webull—you can buy traditional stocks on the app, sure, but are a big part of their product. Their tagline, on their website, is ​​”crypto, stocks, and beyond.” 

According to CNBC, citing eToro: “Nearly three in four would be more interested in a second date with a person who paid the bill in bitcoin.” That sentence could have ended two words sooner, I think, but okay!

The for this survey, which polled 2,000 U.S. residents, claims that “more than 40% of men and 25% of women indicated that their interest in a potential date is stronger when crypto is mentioned.” It also says that “nearly 20% of singles would be more interested in you romantically if you set that NFT as your profile picture on a social platform or dating site.” What the other 80 percent of respondents thought of people changing their Twitter avatars to show they overpaid for is not mentioned in the release.

A trading platform for crypto putting out numbers on how likely you are to get a girlfriend if you’re holding crypto seems a bit like , but I’ll entertain the idea that for some people (I am not the target market here, admittedly), it could be a draw. A spokesperson for eToro told Motherboard that the survey was commissioned from Appinio, a company that makes market research surveys. Appinio conducted the survey on January 3 and 4, 2022, and participants did not need to be eToro users.

The idea that owning cryptocurrency and NFTs is romantically appealing to anyone outside of the crypto-cultural bubble is already very funny, to me. Nothing says romance like a that could get stolen from you at any moment by hackers. But the dirtbag aesthetics, endless scamminess, and rampant privatization of every inch of our digital lives aside, crypto has a , of sexism, even though women are in the space doing notable, worthwhile things. It’s a lot of gatekeeping from guys whose rooms look like . 

These days, it seems like a movement that claims to stand for disruption of old systems of power has largely become overrun with people shilling shitcoins and NFTs, including , corporations, and ; a long slide into hyper-capitalist nonsense that’s helped along by business news outlets reprinting press releases about how diamond hands will get you laid. It’s gotten so bad that a lot of this stuff by even hardcore Bitcoiners.  

If you really want to impress a romantic partner this Valentine’s Day, Motherboard suggests skipping that you don’t own, and making a run at the that was dumped in Central Park and carted around to Wall Street ghouls by yet another crypto clown show. 

This content was originally published here.

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